Grumpy Monday “Saturday, my arse and I finally got to spend some time together”

If you’re going to eat fried Chicken, make sure you go first class, or you could end up suffering all weekend just like me.

Saturday, my arse and I finally got to spend some time together.

It was quite emotional.

I’d smashed my P.B and was going for a World record breaking 25 shits in a day.

Impressive, I know.

3 luxurious rolls of toilet paper had gone.  I was down to my emergency stash, the sandpaper variety – every wipe brought a tear to my eye.

Sunday, I was in mourning suffering from an anal fissure.  Cracked beyond belief, thank you cheap toilet paper.

Thank the lord for “Frank” – the aloe Vera plant.

The Lady wouldn’t help me out, so I had to adopt a D.I.Y approach and was mildly surprised.  D.I.Y isn’t totally off my skills set.

One thing I will be doing again (when needed) is smearing cold Aloe Vera on my butt hole – both soothing and arousing.

I certainly won’t be eating anything from PFC again.  You make me sick – well, almost.

The following links have certainly made my Monday less grumpy:

And

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